The one reason you maybe not as likeable or influential as you’d prefer to be and the three steps to
There is a morning breakfast show here in New Zealand on a channel called TV1 and they have had various presenters over the past year. One of the main female presenters who has now left for maternity leave, I had not be able to warm to and when covid-19 hit with new presenters taking over, I realised that I enjoy and have warmed to the new female presenters now in her place.
In dissecting why I didn’t like the first presenter but do the other two, I realised it was because she always had a hidden agenda. She comes from a political background around the environment and in taking on a new role as a breakfast presenter it seemed that nearly every interview she did, there was always an environmental aspect and agenda in the background attached to those interviews or viewpoints.
Whereas the other two presenters, don’t seem to have a hidden agenda at all which is why I find them more likeable and influential as I listen to them more (i.e. I don’t turn the TV off). They will interview as some of the better Journalists in the world do and that is without a hidden agenda.
Do not get me wrong, I love the environment, but what gets up my goat is hidden agendas and pretending not to have one. The issue though that we all (including me) have hidden agendas, some positive and some negative.
On the positive side, marketing and sales companies for years have used hidden agendas and we seem to get a lot of free things that to them. A lot of online programs now are partially given for free with the hidden agenda that you will sign up at the end of it for a price. We get loads of free information, thanks to hidden agendas that marketers or salespeople use to get us to buy.
On the negative side, hidden agendas are the sticking point for dysfunctional organisations, leaders, teams and individuals and carry with it with ugly office politics.
With hidden agendas of people, we don’t like, or ways things “should” be done, we seem to behave like children at times thinking our way or agenda is the best. We come across in the manner of “I want what I want”, and sometimes with an ego in control siding up to our hidden agenda, we lose sight that actually we may not be right and what we want really isn’t the best for that situation, organisation or the world. When that happens, it automatically closes us off to not going into anything with a childlike curiosity and staying open to the many possibilities that are being presented to us.
That my friends is the biggest issue with any hidden agendas whether positive or negative. On some level, they cause “distrust” because we were not upfront enough to either declare it and / or recognise it and we know that person will try to persuade the conversation in some way to their hidden agenda.
We carry this distrust in our energy field with an already a preconceived view point no matter the situation or person and when this is carried around in your energy field, so too does unlikability and incompetence rather than influence and likeability on some level.
Phew you say, eeeek! Now what do we do to figure out hidden agendas?
I could have given you about 10 ways to not only identify and bring out a hidden agenda but today lets just do three simple ones.
INTUITION – our intuition is our hidden agenda radars. Ask it and then use it and LISTEN TO IT.
INTENTION – always set both a personal and group intention before every meeting and go back to that intention throughout the meeting. This will help alleviate hidden agendas and place honesty on the table upfront!
IDENTIFY – identify your own hidden agendas and become aware of them when they arise.
When I think about hidden agendas I am reminded of this quote:
“I’ve seen too many leaders misunderstand leadership for legacy. Even the most experienced leaders will divide instead of delegate and incite instead of unite to advance hidden personal agendas.”― Richie Norton founder of Global Consulting Circle, creating/scaling business models for venture-backed start-ups and bestselling Author.
As for me, I don’t watch much TV at all anyway as my time is very limited so I shall continue to watch those that influence, keep me open and curious and I shall “turn off” or not "turn up" to those who blatantly have hidden agendas and keep pushing things in their own childish, ignorant ways, being dishonest - intentionally or unintentionally. Outside of that, I have a pretty good intutive radar and I shall continue to trust that along with keep identifying when I too have hidden agendas in any situation.
As a ps. no hidden agenda here other than a love of writing about what I am passionate about and in digging deeper into those parts of me that continously need awareness and work. x
Until next time.
Rachel x www.rachelwotten.com – Playing the game of life BOLDLY and helping others who want to do the same – DO IT!